Fish-Slapping: Polite Public Version

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Swap Coordinator:	rngstgstll (contact)
Swap categories:	Random Items Themed
Number of people in swap:	5
Location:	International
Type:	Type 3: Package or craft
Last day to signup/drop:	May 10, 2014
Date items must be sent by:	June 10, 2014
Number of swap partners:	1
Description:
Teddington Locks, Ham: Yes, it is spring at Teddington Locks and it is time for the Lock-Keepers to celebrate its arrival with the Fish-Slapping Dance. For those of you unfamiliar with this ancient ritual, it is said that it is a very silly dance. So that it may be replicated world wide, this swap has been created. This is a polite version, in which the fish are NOT sent naked, but FULLY CLOTHED and in an envelope. An IMPOLITE version will soon be created at The exclusive spot for silly people on Swap-Bot, so you will want to AVOID THAT for certain if you are offended by NAKED TROUT WEARING KNICKERS, for example. Two smallish, FULLY clothed fish ("deux petits poissons") will be manufactured, created, located and transferred, or otherwise FACSIMILATED, sent in an envelope to your partner, please, with a brief wish for a bounteous boat lock season (or, "une saison eclusiere tres joyeuse"). *It is perfectly legal for fish to be flat, due to international shipping restrictions on three-dimensional fish, let alone those with more than three dimensions!* Said partner will then RATE you on 1) SMELL, or lack thereof, 2) SILLINESS, and slap a nearby creature lightly on the cheek. Slapping oneself on the cheek is frowned upon as it indicates a tendency to insanity. Perhaps swap participation of any sort also suggests this tendency, in which case, YOU MAY WANT TO AVOID THIS SWAP. Participants will be thoroughly vetted by our accountants and anyone lacking sufficient funds to cover lawsuits brought by random passers-by will be rejected, or offered a 1:1 swap. Have great ratings, if you are new have a great profile, have great fun, and yes, I do angel all my swaps.

Discussion

wyrdfae 05/ 4/2014 #

As fish are not usually clothed, I am not sure that I have clothing that would fit a fish. That being said, I could make a fish from scratch that would not make a Victorian blush and stick it in an envelope or wrap it in bubble wrap and paper or something. People should keep in mind that if you put table legs on their fish, it is also polite to cover table legs as well.

plushiecat 05/ 4/2014 #

Tis a sad, sad day indeed when such blatant tomfoolery must transpire in an international swap. Yea verily, the moths--did I say moths? By golly, they aren't that mature! Very well, the caterpillars in my purse cannot handle the costs to send fish of the flightless variety (clothed or elsewise!) overseas. Alas. Mayhaps a US variant of this delight could be made to transpire?

rngstgstll 05/ 4/2014 #

@wyrdfae : You have a great grasp of this swap, simple envelope will do nicely. I hear that there may be a vacancy with the lock-keeper's, I am sure that you would do well should you apply!

@plushiecat : I pity the infant moths in your purse and wish they had a paper fish, no, TWO paper fish to feed upon! Feel free to PM me at a convenient time for a 1:1 swap, or alternatively set up a two-fish swap limited to the 50 states and some other places overrun by the Yanks.

rngstgstll 05/ 4/2014 #

fish slaps

rngstgstll 05/ 4/2014 #

This young man is very properly contrite.

nancylee 05/ 6/2014 #

My fish have no passport and cannot travel the world, yet have a case of wanderlust. We three too would be happy with just one country to send.

wyrdfae 05/ 6/2014 #

Best thread ever:)

rngstgstll 05/ 6/2014 #

canfish

Courtesy of Jolyon Gates on etsy (sadly, gone)

mefish

Y por la fiesta Poblana de ayer, se puede encontrar esta imagen a FishWorld ...

rngstgstll 05/ 6/2014 #

amflfish

rngstgstll 05/ 6/2014 #

US only swap here -- password is soyianqui

rngstgstll 05/ 9/2014 #

If a North American swap is required, let me know. A lumberjack fish with suitable undergarments might show up in the other swap. Just saying.

rngstgstll 05/ 9/2014 #

One more day to join us in the Deux Petits Poissons swap... you know that it is your secret desire (see contrite young man link above) .... Will you regret not participating?

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